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and the saga of my ex boyfriend continues...

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I talked to him today and he says he wants to be with me again. I told him i'd have to think about it and see how everything between us progresses.

well he wants to sleep over here sometime this week like he used to all the time.

I am reserving my right to not make a decision on anything until i see some real progress. He used to like to tell me we were going out or he was coming over and not show up. Granted this was 5 years ago but still patterns sometimes repeat.

 
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Originally Posted by charms23 Wow it seems he doesn't want to take things slow at all! Good for you, waiting to see some real change in him before you let him sleep over again. i'm not doing anything until i see change. and i have told him this. i miss his stupid ass but i'm not jumping into anything.
 

Jen

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I wouldn't let him sleep over anytime soon either. Wait until you see some significant changes.

 
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Originally Posted by Anya1976 i'm not doing anything until i see change. and i have told him this. i miss his stupid ass but i'm not jumping into anything. smart decision of a smart woman. way to go Angela!!!
 
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Good decision Angela, don't let him hurt your feelings. Good luck, I hope he makes wise moves...

Originally Posted by Anya1976 I talked to him today and he says he wants to be with me again. I told him i'd have to think about it and see how everything between us progresses.well he wants to sleep over here sometime this week like he used to all the time.

I am reserving my right to not make a decision on anything until i see some real progress. He used to like to tell me we were going out or he was coming over and not show up. Granted this was 5 years ago but still patterns sometimes repeat.

 
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Why the heck would you want this back in your life after 5 years ?? Why did you guys break up in the first place, if I'm not being too nosey?

Originally Posted by Anya1976 I talked to him today and he says he wants to be with me again. I told him i'd have to think about it and see how everything between us progresses.well he wants to sleep over here sometime this week like he used to all the time.

I am reserving my right to not make a decision on anything until i see some real progress. He used to like to tell me we were going out or he was coming over and not show up. Granted this was 5 years ago but still patterns sometimes repeat.

 
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don't let him sleep over. if you give into him, you'll definitely see the same pattern.

 
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Whoa...have you guys been together since 5 years ago? That's a long break from each other for him to want to come back now! If he was a hassle before, I'd move on to someone new...you don't need old headaches to cause unnecessary problems.

 
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I'd keep away from him. Exes have a bad habit of thinking you could barely live without them if you take them back at any point.

 
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Originally Posted by K*O* Why the heck would you want this back in your life after 5 years ?? Why did you guys break up in the first place, if I'm not being too nosey? he had been abused as a child and had not been to a therapist so he needed treatment he had dealt with depression and all kinds of stuff as a result of the abuse. when we were together i had told him i would go to a shrink with him if he didn't go alone, well at that time he felt he didn't need to go to one. Well after time went on and we broke up he decided to go get help for everything. he goes to his groups and talks about what happened to him and has made HUGE improvements. He says he talks about me alot (in therapy) and he realizes what he did was wrong with his head not being right he made mistakes and he says he still loves me and wants to prove that if we do get back together this time could be different. He wouldnt blow me off (that was our main problem in the relationship)He never treated me badly we only fought because he'd blow me off that was the issue in our relationship.

 
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Originally Posted by lilla Good decision Angela, don't let him hurt your feelings. Good luck, I hope he makes wise moves... well he says that after all this time he has made huge improvements. I didn't talk to him for a long time. and dated many other people. But i do miss the idiot. and generally i am all for the "once we break up we stay broken up" but i can understand why he did do things he did it's because of his past and since he's been in therapy and talking to his shrink things have changed. he doesn't go into that depression cocoon anymore.
 
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Originally Posted by Liz i say exs are exs for a reason. generally i do say that as well. i've never kept in touch with any of myother ex's he's the only one well cus he just pops back into my life and has done that ever since we broke up.
 
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Well, ok...got the gist of the saga....If he's feels he's made HUGE improvements & he wasn't in the frame of mind at the time you were dating him, then give him a second chance - everyone deserves one, I think... Hey, you can always put him at the curb if its not up to your expectations..You would know that better than any one of us here..Good luck and take it nice and slow - don't jump into the fire too fast, just because you know him...Since he's changed, I'd take this as a "new" venture and treat it like one, I'm sure you changed too some what in 5 years too - so it'll be like a whole new "getting to know" each other process from a different point of view.

Originally Posted by Anya1976 he had been abused as a child and had not been to a therapist so he needed treatment he had dealt with depression and all kinds of stuff as a result of the abuse. when we were together i had told him i would go to a shrink with him if he didn't go alone, well at that time he felt he didn't need to go to one. Well after time went on and we broke up he decided to go get help for everything. he goes to his groups and talks about what happened to him and has made HUGE improvements. He says he talks about me alot (in therapy) and he realizes what he did was wrong with his head not being right he made mistakes and he says he still loves me and wants to prove that if we do get back together this time could be different. He wouldnt blow me off (that was our main problem in the relationship)He never treated me badly we only fought because he'd blow me off that was the issue in our relationship.

 
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Originally Posted by K*O* Well, ok...got the gist of the saga....If he's feels he's made HUGE improvements & he wasn't in the frame of mind at the time you were dating him, then give him a second chance - everyone deserves one, I think... Hey, you can always put him at the curb if its not up to your expectations..You would know that better than any one of us here..Good luck and take it nice and slow - don't jump into the fire too fast, just because you know him...Since he's changed, I'd take this as a "new" venture and treat it like one, I'm sure you changed too some what in 5 years too - so it'll be like a whole new "getting to know" each other process from a different point of view. exactly.
i don't want to jump into anything and i have told him that. he knows how i feel. I told him he has to prove himself.

and yea i am sure i have changed too. hopefully i'll see where things are going soon.

 
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All the Best :icon_love

Originally Posted by Anya1976 exactly.
i don't want to jump into anything and i have told him that. he knows how i feel. I told him he has to prove himself.

and yea i am sure i have changed too. hopefully i'll see where things are going soon.

 
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Originally Posted by K*O* All the Best :icon_love thanks, i am sure i will keep ya'll updated lol.
 
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I am glad he got help and improved the meaning of his life. I do understand why you would give him another chance now. I hope everything works out for the best and make sure you let him know if he blows you off again, he is gone


Good luck to both of you


Originally Posted by Anya1976 well he says that after all this time he has made huge improvements. I didn't talk to him for a long time. and dated many other people. But i do miss the idiot. and generally i am all for the "once we break up we stay broken up" but i can understand why he did do things he did it's because of his past and since he's been in therapy and talking to his shrink things have changed. he doesn't go into that depression cocoon anymore.
 
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Second chances are good, but it's pretty difficult for a leopard to change its spots! So take it slow, don't let yourself fall too fast - and see what happens


 
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Originally Posted by lilla I am glad he got help and improved the meaning of his life. I do understand why you would give him another chance now. I hope everything works out for the best and make sure you let him know if he blows you off again, he is gone
Good luck to both of you


oh he knows that lol, i make that perfectly clear lol
 

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