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the sadest "love"-story ever

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ok this is what just happened to me or more like what I just found out. the whole thing started out great and turned out more than aweful. I´m gonna make this as short as i can and put it in chronological order


1. met this amazing guy in the US in Sept 04.

2. we fell in love with each other

3. spent the best 2 weeks of my life together

4. I went back to austria thinking I would never see him again

5. turned out I actually would see him again. he offered to pay for my ticket to come see him in Feb 05

6. I stayed completely faithful to him the whole time (without him asking me too.)

7. he said he did the same (now I´m not sure if I can still believe this)

8. I came over in Feb

9. first few days went GREAT

10. after that he sorta pulled away from me and kept him at distance emotionally

11. I caught him lying to me about one night. I spent the night at a friend´s house, he was SUPPOSED to spend the night at a different friend´s house too.

12. next day I wanted to borrow his digicam and looked through the pics on it. saw a pic of him in his apartment, dated the nite he was supposed to be somewhere else. looked like they had a party over there. there was also a pic of a girl on the camera, but she wasn´t very pretty so I wasn´t worried

13. I asked him about it and he tried to convince me that camera dated the pic wrong. I didn´t completely buy it but wasn´t suspicious b/c of the pic of that girl I wasn´t jealous

14. a week after that I went back to austria and before I left I wrote him a card saying I loved him

15. he didn´t call or e-mail me for 3 weeks

16. then he e-mails me and tells me he loves me too and asks me if we can be together in the future (he´s already left now. he just joined the army)

17. I am soo happy to hear this from him and start having all those ridiculous daydreams about marrying him and move over there after school (which I still probably will!!)

18. our mutual friend e-mails me that he proposed to his psycho ex girlfriend and they´re engaged now. he didn´t want her to tell me b/c "he doesn´t want me to get hurt"

what the F***????? I hate guys right now.


 
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ugh... that guy is cr@p.

Originally Posted by Arielle ok this is what just happened to me or more like what I just found out. the whole thing started out great and turned out more than aweful. I´m gonna make this as short as i can and put it in chronological order

1. met this amazing guy in the US in Sept 04.

2. we fell in love with each other

3. spent the best 2 weeks of my life together

4. I went back to austria thinking I would never see him again

5. turned out I actually would see him again. he offered to pay for my ticket to come see him in Feb 05

6. I stayed completely faithful to him the whole time (without him asking me too.)

7. he said he did the same (now I´m not sure if I can still believe this)

8. I came over in Feb

9. first few days went GREAT

10. after that he sorta pulled away from me and kept him at distance emotionally

11. I caught him lying to me about one night. I spent the night at a friend´s house, he was SUPPOSED to spend the night at a different friend´s house too.

12. next day I wanted to borrow his digicam and looked through the pics on it. saw a pic of him in his apartment, dated the nite he was supposed to be somewhere else. looked like they had a party over there. there was also a pic of a girl on the camera, but she wasn´t very pretty so I wasn´t worried

13. I asked him about it and he tried to convince me that camera dated the pic wrong. I didn´t completely buy it but wasn´t suspicious b/c of the pic of that girl I wasn´t jealous

14. a week after that I went back to austria and before I left I wrote him a card saying I loved him

15. he didn´t call or e-mail me for 3 weeks

16. then he e-mails me and tells me he loves me too and asks me if we can be together in the future (he´s already left now. he just joined the army)

17. I am soo happy to hear this from him and start having all those ridiculous daydreams about marrying him and move over there after school (which I still probably will!!)

18. our mutual friend e-mails me that he proposed to his psycho ex girlfriend and they´re engaged now. he didn´t want her to tell me b/c "he doesn´t want me to get hurt"

what the F***????? I hate guys right now.


 
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OMG what a complete ASS. I can't believe he didnt have the decency to call you himself though. So sorry to hear about this Arielle. Men are right ****** when they want to be.. **HUGS being sent to you now**. Feel free to rant as much as you want on here


 
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forgot to mention this: the girl on the pic was his exgirlfriend-now his faincée. he basically made up this whole story about having a job meeting the next day and wanted me to spend the night somewhere else "so I wouldn´t be alone at the apartment". just to see her. after he payed $800 for my plane ticket and a 5 hour car drive to the airport (in a different US-STATE!)to pick me up.

he must be out of his mind. I think he needs therapy
that girl already cheated on him, she´s bisexual, she scratched his car after he broke up with her and once she got into his e-mail account and erased all his e-mails. (i guess after she saw the e-mails I sent HIM) and he chose that crazy B**** over me!!!

and he´s only 21, and still a little immature sometimes and unstable, totally crazy (just like her *g*). so I know this is not gonna last. this proposal means nothing really. it just hurts that told me he loved me just to propose to this chick 3 days (!) later. I wanna kill him right now

 
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Damn Arielle! That's horrible! If this guy is that much of a jerk, and obvioulsly very stupid, you're probably lucky you didn't end up with him! He certainly doesn't deserve to be with you - and I'm sure that the right guy will come along when you least expect it, and then guy#1 will see what an a$$hole he was and by then - you'll be so happy you won't even remember 'Whats his name'! (You can just feel bad for his sorry self!
lol)
 
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Unfortunately, there are people who thrive on drama. They feed off of it, and it sounds like he is one of those people. Why take a beautiful sane girl like you who will love him and have a normal life, when he can have a psycho girl that you will never know what she will do next. It doesn't make any sense to me, but I have seen it happen first hand to people I care about around me and it sucks! All I can say is that it is his loss and he'll regret it someday, and you WILL find someone who treats you the way you should be treated and don't settle for anything less!
 

Jen

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Jess took the words right out of my mouth.


 
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it´s so horrible what happened to you. and you´re right, I still don´t hate "my" guy either. I just can´t understand why people can say I love you and not mean it. everybody KNOWS that this is the way to hurt people most. saying I love you can be the greatest gift, and I was so glad I hear that from my guy. but know that I know it was probably all lies it is the worst and most hurtful thing anybody ever told me. I wished he wouldn´t have said it.

and yes, girls know if something´s wrong. I had the same, weird feeling so I checked his digicam (ok, I saw those pics by chance, I wasn´t really checking it). well guys try to tell us we are making these weird feelings up, but if you feel like something´s wrong there probably is.

I have no words for either "my" guy or Ralfie. there are no words to describe what´s going on in their heads. they are characterless human beings. even if they didn´t mean to hurt us on purpose they still did. and they probably don´t even really feel guilty.

right now I´m thinking about turning gay
....cause girls are better people anyway *g*

 
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arielle, i am so sorry you're going through this. you are SO sweet and you seem so harmless and i'm sure you didn't deserve it. move on, but i know it's easier said than done. i know what it's like to get walked all over and still want a part of the guy. he's seriously SUCH a jerk and is not worth any of your time. think about it, though: he paid all that money so you could come to the US and drove so many hours. suckaaaaaaa


i really hope everything gets better, though, and i wish you the best. feel free to vent here


piink, i'm so sorry that happened to you, too. what a jerk! he's definitely not worth your tears or any part of you. at least you gained some good friends and got rid of the biggest jerk - ever. i know it's hard, but think of all the bad things you won't have to go through. you'll move on from it. trust me. i've been there, done that. good luck


 
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Oh I am feeling your pain girls. I am the sole guy here and wanted to lay it out to you in man terms. Now, just to preface this, I am not talking about me, but rather about guys in general. But, let me say one thing, NOT ALL guys are like this, but alot are. Consider WHERE you meet them, being a good indication of them. (Bars, etc)

OK here goes:

Alot of the times, we guys are only after one thing. Legs open. It's the sad truth. I myself love companionship and fun. I love hangin' out! So, it hard to listen to my buddies when they joke about that stuff. Sure, sex is HOT and FUN, but alot of the times, feelings should be considered.

There are alot of great guys out there!





Originally Posted by Arielle

it´s so horrible what happened to you. and you´re right, I still don´t hate "my" guy either. I just can´t understand why people can say I love you and not mean it. everybody KNOWS that this is the way to hurt people most. saying I love you can be the greatest gift, and I was so glad I hear that from my guy. but know that I know it was probably all lies it is the worst and most hurtful thing anybody ever told me. I wished he wouldn´t have said it.and yes, girls know if something´s wrong. I had the same, weird feeling so I checked his digicam (ok, I saw those pics by chance, I wasn´t really checking it). well guys try to tell us we are making these weird feelings up, but if you feel like something´s wrong there probably is.

I have no words for either "my" guy or Ralfie. there are no words to describe what´s going on in their heads. they are characterless human beings. even if they didn´t mean to hurt us on purpose they still did. and they probably don´t even really feel guilty.

right now I´m thinking about turning gay
....cause girls are better people anyway *g*





 
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Originally Posted by Piink Vanilla Thanks..Im so sorry that you are suffering as well. I love my lesbian and Bi friends..I have those thoughts too LOL
I dont think im serious though lol Every girl who suffer major heartaches by men have these thoughts. Im in so much pain, I feel like I wasn't good enough when I did everything right..I feel like I should have pleased him more..been better at everything even though I always tried and never gave up on anything from school, health, work and us. Sometimes I wish I was her. The only thing nice he said to me that last day on the phone was "You have a bigger and warmer heart than she does" I hate all the lies..all the crying and I love yous he promised me and my father as well. My dad is out for blood since he feels like a fool ..like he was lied to his face. I hate thinking about them making love, laughing together as we did, sharing inside thoughts, vacationing together, planning the future..etc..everything I once had and still want with him. I miss his smile, his laughs, our laughs together, his voice, his love making lol..yes he was great so now im so mad she has that lol, just laying in his arms, waking up next to him....everything!!!! When will this pain go away? I'm greatful his friends know he is 100% wrong and although they are his friend still..are on my side.. I'm happy I didn't lose them because my relationship with them over the years has grown. I can't stop thinking about him every minute since everything has happened since November but, even worse, now I can't stop thinking about the events, lies, discoveries over the past months. The worst pain ever...and still i have the tiny hope that one day he will call and really mean I love you or at least "Im truly sorry" but I know that it is a false hope.
i know what you mean. trust me, though, you're BETTER than him because people like that have no heart, whatsoever.


Originally Posted by Tony(admin) Oh I am feeling your pain girls. I am the sole guy here and wanted to lay it out to you in man terms. Now, just to preface this, I am not talking about me, but rather about guys in general. But, let me say one thing, NOT ALL guys are like this, but alot are. Consider WHERE you meet them, being a good indication of them. (Bars, etc)
OK here goes:

Alot of the times, we guys are only after one thing. Legs open. It's the sad truth. I myself love companionship and fun. I love hangin' out! So, it hard to listen to my buddies when they joke about that stuff. Sure, sex is HOT and FUN, but alot of the times, feelings should be considered.

There are alot of great guys out there!

tony, very true! it's so hard to trust guys these days *sigh*
 
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OK girls. I REALLY feel sorry for you. I feel your pain. Had a boyfriend cheating on me with my best friend.. for a whole year.. so been there, done that..

BUT.. OK everybody is going to hate me know.. why are you calling him so often?? His behavior was so predictable! I have a feeling you were just hoping everything would be OK, but knew what was going on and STILL wanted to be with him. (guess thats what they mean when they say "love makes people blind", we've all been victims of that)

so you learn from it, and move on. Don't call him, he is probably annoyed right now, and that brings him even closer with that girl.(we don't want to give her that pleasure
) His friends (even though they are your friends now too) are going to stay his friends, and they WILL let that girl into the apartment. That's what friends are for, in good and the bad times. So never be mad at them.

But there is one thing I don't understand.. You know his passwords?? Checking his email??


Oh no!! Now that's freaking me out!

Please don't take everything I said wrong! Life sucks! It's not just men! (his friends are pretty cool, right?)

You'll be fine. Eventually. Till then, please don't do anything stupid! Don't try to make him jealous, don't call him. The best way to get back at those guys is to really ignore them. Don't tell them you hate them, that only shows you still care about them. Ignore them, act as if nothing happend around them, as if they don't EXIST, they don't MATTER. Now that hurts way more then saying him thousand times how much you hate him..

GIRLZ RULE!!

ps. Life is a witch.. And then You marry one!
(made you smile
)

 
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Oh my god Piink, that's horrible! I can honestly say there is nothing more painful than having your trust betrayed by someone you think you know really well. Sorry to hear your story... glad to have you here with us on MuT though!
You sound like a really sweet girl, and honestly - from experience - a jerk will always be a jerk. It's hard to think someone won't eventually change, but in most cases... they dont' change traits like that. And you will be hurt over & over again. Better to try and find someone else than to wait for him to change - because if he did that to you that many times... he will always be like that.
 
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Originally Posted by Piink Vanilla Afterall, she did admit to him in her letter that she can be "a crazy psycho b**) somtimes LOL... Well there ya' go ! LOL
They deserve each other! they're both obviously NUTTY! They'll be a better guy out there soon - and you're not forced to trust anyone until they show you that they DESERVE it...

 
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ok I just have to add one more thing to my story. my friend over there just e-mailed me this

"my" guy proposed to this psycho girl ONE DAY after she broke off her engagement with another guy. their engagement lasted only 2 months. and the whole 2 months that girls was cheating on her fiance with "my" guy. how ridiculous is that?

they are both 21 years old and it´s a shame they´re both so immature and plain STUPID! an engagement is a commitment and it´s supposed to mean something. it´t not something you get in and out of as you please.

and now they want to get married in 8 months. until that "my" guy is gonna be in the army and she is probably gonna sleep with every guy in town


it felt so good to hear that. and my friend ensured me that he has/had feelings for me. he told HER that he loves me, so I´m sure it was true to a certain point, b/c the two of them are like siblings. so it turned out I haven´t completely been played. he probably loves me in a weird, twisted, crazy way. but being 20 years old I know that I don´t need a guy with the maturity level of a 10 year old!!!!

just had to share this story. I don´t know bout you guys, but I laughed my ASS OFF!!!!!

 
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Hi ........Wow, are these all Americans?





Originally Posted by Arielle

ok I just have to add one more thing to my story. my friend over there just e-mailed me this
"my" guy proposed to this psycho girl ONE DAY after she broke off her engagement with another guy. their engagement lasted only 2 months. and the whole 2 months that girls was cheating on her fiance with "my" guy. how ridiculous is that?

they are both 21 years old and it´s a shame they´re both so immature and plain STUPID! an engagement is a commitment and it´s supposed to mean something. it´t not something you get in and out of as you please.

and now they want to get married in 8 months. until that "my" guy is gonna be in the army and she is probably gonna sleep with every guy in town


it felt so good to hear that. and my friend ensured me that he has/had feelings for me. he told HER that he loves me, so I´m sure it was true to a certain point, b/c the two of them are like siblings. so it turned out I haven´t completely been played. he probably loves me in a weird, twisted, crazy way. but being 20 years old I know that I don´t need a guy with the maturity level of a 10 year old!!!!

just had to share this story. I don´t know bout you guys, but I laughed my ASS OFF!!!!!





 
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Originally Posted by Tony(admin) Hi ........Wow, are these all Americans? yes they are
. but I still wanna move over there for good one day. crazy, huh?
 
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I see. Well, let me tell you. By the looks of your pictures, you will have NO PROBLEM finding a decent guy over here.
I married a European and it has been wonderful. Oh, how lucky I am
You proabaly have an excellent sweet Austrian accent and guys here will kill to be a part of that!

You're typing of English is like it's your native language! It's very good.

When are you planning on returning?





Originally Posted by Arielle

yes they are
. but I still wanna move over there for good one day. crazy, huh?



 
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Originally Posted by Tony(admin) I see. Well, let me tell you. By the looks of your pictures, you will have NO PROBLEM finding a decent guy over here.
I married a European and it has been wonderful. Oh, how lucky I am
You proabaly have an excellent sweet Austrian accent and guys here will kill to be a part of that!
You're typing of English is like it's your native language! It's very good.

When are you planning on returning?

I guess I do have an accent. american guys always used to tell me how sexy that sounds, but I want to get RID of it!!!! damnit


and I will come back Febuary next year. my host parents (who I stayed with for 6 months being an exchange student during my junior year) offered to pay for my plane ticket. *yay*

although the people I wrote about below are the craziest americans I ever met I love all my friends and my family over there to death!!! a lot of people here have prejudices about americans but these people were so good to me that I developed so much love for the people and the country that I´m very possibly gonna move over there once I´m done with school.

CAN`T WAIT!!!!

 
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Lose it??? ARE YOU CRAZY??? Don't!! Keep it, it's your heritage and homeland accent! Plus it's YOU! Reija still has some Finnish accent and I still love it

Yes, we know alot of people hate Americans, but most just don't understand us and how we think
Nevertheless, it's a fun place. Plus we have Disneyland LOL





Originally Posted by Arielle

I guess I do have an accent. american guys always used to tell me how sexy that sounds, but I want to get RID of it!!!! damnit
and I will come back Febuary next year. my host parents (who I stayed with for 6 months being an exchange student during my junior year) offered to pay for my plane ticket. *yay*

although the people I wrote about below are the craziest americans I ever met I love all my friends and my family over there to death!!! a lot of people here have prejudices about americans but these people were so good to me that I developed so much love for the people and the country that I´m very possibly gonna move over there once I´m done with school.

CAN`T WAIT!!!!





 

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